20 (05182011)

20, officially.

Even if the sky is falling down?

So, I currently have some free time to write an actual blog, that of which I haven't done in....well lets just say its been way to long.

My god, where to start....so we moved into a house, we have a huge backyard for our puppie's, the house itself is that of questionable condition, but its the best we could do on our time frame/budget.

I guess I should rewind a bit to October 2010.

I was having this really weird feeling in my side, it worried me enough to walk through my ghetto-ass neighborhood at 1am to go to the hospital. I woke CJ up before I left, put the house phone by his head, and told him if I wasn't home in time to get him up for work that I would call until he wakes up. Long story short, he woke up to a trashed house, Nahla and Zim didn't take to kindly to my leaving... CJ didn't remember me telling him what was going on, and thought I was out doing drugs and such. Which at the time I hadn't done in months.

He broke-up with me, and told me that my job at cineplex didn't count, so when I got home from the hospital I cleaned up our place, and called around for jobs, one told me to come in right away. I got the job! and so I went home (still feeling like shit might I add) and waited to tell CJ that our problems were solved and its all good... but he didn't see things that way.

So basically I was a fucking mess. His mom told me to come spend the night with her to give CJ a break... which I did. However, it was the next day that put in motion the spun out situation I am currently in.

See, my best friend Serena, and CJ's best friend Donny recently broke-up at the time, and since Serena and CJ have the same last name we always refer to themn as "our Patterson's"...and I don't know why, but I figured if I went to Donny's, CJ would be a lot happier then if I went to my ex's. BUT Donny told me how he had recently come to aquire a large amount of money, and one thing led to another and we ended up getting high.

While high, Donny and I decided it would be a bad idea to tell CJ, as CJ was on his way over to also get high with Donny.

The next day CJ came home and we got back together, and everything went back to normal.

BUT! a week later CJ decided to get drunk with some people that lived in our building, and they got him in a rage about me or something... needless to say our apartment got trashed, and CJ ended up with the cops.

[INSERT BS THAT HAPPENED WITH JUSTIN AND SABLE AND TYLER HERE]

The week following was shaky. At the end of the week he took the xbox to Donny's "just to chill", and he ended up getting high... well, I ended up chilling with Ashley because I didn't want to be home by myself... and all of a sudden CJ calls me and break's up with me, it was pretty bad.

[INSERT CJ COMING HOME FOR FOOD AFTER OUR BREAK-UP HERE]

Yeah...that wasn't pretty.

That night I ended up at my ex-gf's. That night I met Ronda. That night I got high. Basically that night, I broke the fuck down.

I started seeing Ronda every day, and every day she'd smoke me up. As well as I had a small stash of my own.

UHM!

[INSERT CJ WAKING UP AT 2AM AND FINDING ME GETTING HIGH IN THE LIVING ROOM HERE]

We ended up getting back together at that point, because then he too got high. and well, basically we haven't stopped getting high. Its ridiculous.

and I've lost like 3 jobs in 2 months... :( blah.

I just do my best to stay positive, 'cause like, this is all happening for a reason...right?

anyways, until next time

<3 Love PG

05152011

WOW....talk about a capital O!

The 10th Day of the 5th Month and the 2011th Year

"when your balls, get calls...
B I N G O!"

lol well, haven't slept in days, totally in lala-land puddle jumper mode. Don't know
when I'll reset back to normality, however it better be soon because I'm supposed to be
landing a job in T-5.5 hours.

Love <3

Reverie: Time of OUR Lives?

K.

Brutal honesty time....


I have come to the point in my relationship where I am in the circle of abuse.

Dr.Drew said it the best the other day on Teen Mom 2: Reunion.

It goes round and round... you abuse each other and then make up and say "its because I
love you so much" ....

The point im at is not necessarily to abandon my circle, but to make it rather a circle of
likeness.

but I'm unsure of that happening so my other options are open... not sure what they are yet
though...

Write more later...

unlovingly yours, Latsyrcatek

Reverie: Spun-Out?Spin-Out?

ATTENTION:

Haha, are you looking?

Have you ever seen the movie Spun? well if you have, that has been my life for the past almost 2 weeks. If you haven't, let me explain in a little bit of detail of what Spun entails.

Meth, Gang members, Cops, Wigged-out Bitches, Not Sleeping, Doing the Nod, basically, a lot of
illegal activity.

I cant even tell you the amount of people I had in and out of my house, but one girl flushed a bag
of drugs down my toilet and told my boyfriend it was going to someone in Australia....I know right.

We just got everybody out yesterday, ohhh and some luck did find its way to me, because I got
the job, but I need another one STAT.

but CJ wants me to go get him some ice cream. I just ordered us like $50 worth of Chinese from
Smiley's, which apparently isn't complete until I get the icecream. silly boy.

k write more later.

Reverie: Fucka-mucka-lucka-ding-dong

YOOOOO!

wassup? so I've been on one of my things for fucking a really long fucking time, I don't even know man. All I can say is its full of crying, fighting, laughing, loving, sex and other stuff like that. Uh, I had this new awesome job in December, but fuckers let me go, for NO reason, and now I am just
straight fucked. Like who does that? FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All I can say is that since shit went down in like November I can't stop this mutha-fuckin shit

No idea why its so hard, but fuck, I don't even like it... oh yeah I fucking love it *insert finger in eye*

OH!!!!!!!!!! and now we have like well connected people crashing at our place right now, so we really can't stop. Man, what am I going to do.

Time for some contradiction though, no really, are you ready blog?????????

Remember my old blogs, where I devoted my love etc. to that girl, and that even 10 years from then I would never regret it...etc. Well its not even 2 years, and I'm not going to lie... what a fucking waste of my life. I mean I accept it happened for a reason (not sure what yet though, I'll get back to you on that one)....but really????? WHY MUTHA-FUCKIN me????

shoulda-coulda-woulda... *sighs*

the worst part is I'm too paranoid to do my happy drugs anymore, I mean, I really miss K and E... ugh...

but yeah, I have a job interview at Rexall at 5pm, lets hope some sort of luck smacks me upside the head today, I really fucking need it and shit.

Oh and in December this pregnant head Ronda chilled here, it was kinda fucking ridiculous, and its like I have her twin here now or something... but fuck will tell you more on a later date.. or I'll try.