Reverie: Real Talk

Honestly I miss Devin. I miss our calls at 5 & 9, I miss hearing his voice. Yeah I feel like there's a huge void in my life.

I also feel like I can't miss him, I can't cry, I have to pretend like I dont wake up wishing he'd never done this to me again... but I do, and he did & I just have to keep on living like it doesn't bother me because if I don't I'll get swept away by my emotions.

I mean on the outside its ok, I'm meeting my requirements, and I'm not isolating in my room. 
Which is good, but also scary.

I'm trying to work through my steps and deal with this is a safe way that doesn't come back to haunt me later. One day at a time I'm ok without him. One day at a time I'm ok with just me.

I'm getting really excited for my Grad to Block 2. Finally I'll get to be in class with my best friend Alex again.

I'm going to spend the weekend with my Grandma, she's pretty excited. She's been missing me the past month and a half because first she was sick, then I was sick, and then Devin left me so I was kind of isolating.

That is all for today.